The Brown Girl’s (or Guy’s) Guide to Divorce: What to Do When Your Culture Collides with Your Divorce with Author and Coach, Cindy Gunraj on Divorce & Beyond #247

On this week's episode, Host, Susan Guthrie and Special Guest, Cindy Gunraj discuss the layered and nuanced topic of cultural norms as they relate to divorce and how your family's expectations and beliefs can make a difficult experience even harder.

Cindy Gunraj is a brown woman who has tackled the difficult experience of divorce within a family construct and culture that prizes marriage and family above the individual.  Her experience brought her into direct conflict with her parents and extended family in a way that made her divorce feel like a failure not only on a personal level, but on a societal one as well.  The bright side is that Cindy persevered, worked to understand and appreciate the love while also challenging those cultural norms in a way that ultimately resulted in her receiving her family's support for her divorce and her parents' blessing.  Cindy shares her experience and her insights to help others who are facing a divorce that collides with their family, culture, religion and more in her book, Winning Your Parents' Approval for Divorce: 7 Practices to Leave Your Marriage with Their Blessing.

Some topics that Cindy and Susan discuss:

  • How Cindy's parents and extended family reacted to her announcement that she was getting a divorce
  • The ways in which a brown woman's or man's self-image are tied to their cultural norms and challenged when those norms and broken
  • Why boundary setting is a necessary part of seeking family approval and support in divorce
  • Why "priming" is an essential tool for dealing with family get-togethers and events
  • How self-care is at the core of finding a way to merge your own happiness with your family's expectations

This episode is the essential starter guide for merging your family, culture and your need for personal happiness and growth - be sure to listen!

GET A FREE E-COPY OF CINDY'S BOOK!:  It's easy, just send Cindy and email at cindy@stillnessblooms.com and mention "Divorce & Beyond!"

Get Cindy's second book: Listen to Yourself: The Brown Girl’s Guide to Trusting Your Intuition

Find out more about Cindy and her coaching services:  www.stillnessblooms.com

Check out the Costa Rica Retreat in August, 2022: https://stillnessblooms.com/retreat/

About this week's special guest: Cindy Gunraj

Peeling away the veils of cultural taboos, Cindy Gunraj bravely left a stifling marriage and deepened bonds with her parents. She’s an ICF credited coach and certified divorce coach helping women who are contemplating divorce and are deeply concerned about cultural pressures that come into play in divorce. Cindy’s also the author of 1# Amazon bestseller,  “Winning Your Parents’ Approval for Divorce. 7 Practices to Leave Your Marriage with Their Blessing.”  Her most recent book “Listen to Yourself: The Brown Girl’s Guide to Trusting Your Intuition” was a 1# Amazon International Best Seller.  Cindy enjoys hiking and spending time with her corgi Joy and life partner David. 

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THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSOR:

MY DIVORCE SOLUTION

It’s common to experience anxiety about your finances when it comes to divorce. To manage that anxiety, My Divorce Solution created The Divorce Financial Portrait, the ultimate divorce tool to avoid common financial pitfalls. Too often, spouses act prematurely or enter into a settlement agreement without knowing the financial impact.  Financial knowledge is essential when determining alimony, child support, and the division of assets and liabilities. And it makes a difficult situation better for everyone—especially for children.   Head on over to their website -mydivorcesolution.com to get more information. If you are thinking about divorce or in the middle of it, obtain your “Divorce Financial Portrait™” to make smart and confident financial decisions.

Learn more at MyDivorceSolution.com. and don’t forget to tell them that you heard about it on the Divorce & Beyond Podcast!

Listen to the Founders of My Divorce Solution on the show in a special Two-Part Episode!

Part One: Tackling the Top 5 Financial Roadblocks of Divorce with Karen Chellew & Catherine Shanahan of My Divorce Solution

Part Two: Tackling the Top 5 Financial Roadblocks of Divorce with Karen Chellew & Catherine Shanahan of My Divorce Solution

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MEET OUR CREATOR AND HOST:

SUSAN GUTHRIE®, ESQ., the creator and host of The Divorce and Beyond® Podcast, is nationally recognized as one of the top family law and divorce mediation attorneys in the country.  Susan is a member of the Executive Council of the American Bar Association Section of Dispute Resolution and is the Founder of Divorce in a Better Way® which provides a curated selection of resources and information for those facing divorce and other life changes. 

Internationally renowned as one of the leading experts in online mediation, Susan created her Learn to Mediate Online® program and has trained more than 18,000 professionals in how to transition their practice online.  Susan recently partnered with legal and mediation legend, Forrest "Woody" Mosten to create the Mosten Guthrie Academy which provides gold standard, fully online training for mediation and collaborative professionals at all stages of their career.  

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You can get in touch with Susan at divorceandbeyondpod@gmail.com

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DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN LEGAL ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM

 

 

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